Ah, summertime. For the past year or so, we’ve been serving up close to a million MP3s a month. It only seems fair that we should give something back to those who’ve taken so much. Over the coming weeks, we’ll be very slow in serializing the unfinished Bollywood masterpiece Kissing is Forbidden, a tribute to critical thinkers, Woody Allen, and PBS. Chronicling the unusual adventures of a telepathic used car dealer who—as you may have guessed—is strictly prohibited from engaging in even the most basic form of amorous interplay, Kissing  boasts an ensemble cast whose unforgettable characters defy truly unbelievable odds, propelled into all manner of uncompromising situations which they must overcome in a host of uninteresting and increasingly unexceptional ways. Jam-packed with suspense, time travel, action, mystery, suspense, and (least of all) kissing, Forbidden is sure to leave you longing for the legalization of morphine. Each episode is approximately 30 minutes long, encoded as an .mp4. No plans to stream it at this time.  Sorry.  Ctrl-click or right-click to save. All rights reserved. Filmed in Narrowvision™.

  Part 1
  Part 2

  Note: this series is a work of parody, utilizing footage from several films starring Amitabh Bachchan—classics like Zanjeer (1973), Don (1976), and Kaalia (1980). Bachchan is one of India’s most recognizable actors, having appeared in more than 170 films. He’s had more nominations for Best Actor at the Filmfare Awards than any performer in history. In no way is this send-up meant to offend the very talented Mr. Bachchan, the films’ writers or directors, or any fan of Hindustani cinema.